Green Crack

For established stoners, there's a selection of strands which we all go back to at some point, a universal repertoire of danktronics. We all have come to know and love OG, Sour Diesel, G.D.P., etc. Today I'll be discussing Green Crack.

I've always heard of Green Crack in sentences like "Dude!... Green Crack!" or "Dude, lemme get some of that Green Crack." This set up my perception of the strain to be good from the get go. However, like with all the standard strains, you have to take authenticity into account. Some of the first herb I'd ever seen with seeds was labeled as GC. With the authentic stuff, you are going to be a happy camper. Very happy... Maybe hungry too.

I recently came across some pretty cute nugs of the stuff. I'd say it's definitely a wonderful sativa that keeps you going without any couch lock.

With that, it's not that special relative to what everybody has worked it up to be.

But... it is damn good. Very well rounded and legit. It might not be that face melting or that stimulating to one's olfactory sensations, but yeah it's good. All the italics are just me being a snooty connoisseur. An adequate explanation might be that it's the Sierra Nevada of herb. It's good and probably better then what the generic frat boy might drink, but next to a good Chimay, there's a clear difference.


My reflections are as follows:

Price: if you find it for 50 clams for an 1/8 ounce, go for it. I wouldn't put it in the 60 dollar range though. If you find it at cheaper than 45, you're probably dealing with its ugly little brother instead of the real thing. That ugly little brother might suffice, but if you're a connoisseur you can do better.

Smell/Taste: Good. It's not going to smell in the other room, but you'll be satisfied probably. The taste is good too, but I've had buds with more body and spice to them in my day.

Side effects: It's a good clean sativa, you won't be too couch locked or inclined to go to sleep. I would take advantage of it with your favorite tunes, a good movie, etc. Not ideal for pain treatment or insomnia.

Convert Cookies

In an effort to go easy on my lungs, I decided that it was time to experiment with making edibles. I had done this in the past in a half baked manner the way many herbal cooking newbs might. I would throw an 1/8 ounce of nice cannabis in some oil, simmer it for a bit, then hope for the best.

Wrong.

Part of the problem was a lack of lipids in the oil. I was going for canola oil instead of butter because I don't eat animal products. With guidance from my friend, a cannabis-infused-food guru and a few articles, I came to coconut oil. This is a really good vegan cannabis cooking staple due to its high concentration of fat.

Anyway, after a few batches, I have perfected the recipe for my "convert cookies." This eggless cookie is flavored with various spices that negate the odd taste that comes from the trimmings in the canna-oil and with flax and oatmeal, you get a good dose of fiber along with your pain relief.


As for the name: While in an extra dry area where smoking is not allowed, my friend brought some of these cookies so she would still be able to medicate. This was on a class retreat with a professor who was at one point convinced to eat a cookie.

This professor, over 70 years old, has been converted to our side as he woke up the day after the cookie, realizing he has his best sleep in years. Now he is a medical cannabis patient for insomnia and regularly utilizes THC/CBN extracts and concentrates. From what I hear, he's considering investing in a vaporizer now.


I loved hearing this and I'm so glad that my cookin' has had a positive impact on somebody's life (and more importantly I created a 70 year old stoner!!!) However, I have a more educated understanding of edible medication now.

My reflections are as follows:
-Know that it takes some time to kick in.
-With that, know that the effects are a long winded, gradual crescendo then decrescendo, rather than the immediacy and short time span of smoking
-If you're impatient and medicate by smoking after eating, you're probably going to overshadow the effects
-Edibles are far superior for pain relief and sleep aid as they are more concentrated in CBN.
-One should beware, it's easy to eat too much before going to sleep and then maybe go to their classes the following morning only to realize they are too medicated to speak in Chinese... Do I speak from experience? Eh...

For now my recipe is secret, but if you have any baking questions, I've recently dedicated a significant amount of time to developing my baking chops and while not wanting to reveal my perfected recipe, I'm willing to lend a helping hand.

Blackberry

Blackberry is nuts. Kiefiest weed I've found in LA.

More specifically, this stuff is a pretty smooth smoke. I'm going to infer it's sativa dominant, even though the buds might say otherwise. I recommend jars for this to preserve the resin glands and insure there's no distortion of the nuggage.

Blackberry is extremely dense and the small nugs are like sparkling little balls of green and purple. I finally had to give in and rip apart my largest nug and the inside glistens like whoa. I guess such a sight compensates for my stoner heresy in ripping up such a beaut'.

In summation: it's dank, get it, use whatever method you feel in the mood for and I'm sure it will be highly satisfactory.

The Holy Hit

The Holy Hit.

I feel like these days half of the fun of smoking weed is the names. But do they mean anything? Meh... I'm going to go with "maybe psychologically?"

I've come by many odd strain names like Sgt. Pepper, "Fuck," and Kush flavors from cantaloupe to pork roast. Ok, fine, I didn't ever come by Pork Roast Kush, but the Holy Hit got me with the name. I must've been in a rush or something because I didn't even glance at the selection other than that. I just figured "Eh, it's from the clubs, why be picky?"

The nuggage:

It's light but dense. There is practically no shake or large unsightly leaves. The nugs were pretty moderately sized, but with a nice shape.

The effects:

I'd say it was a mild indica dominant hybrid as it made me a tad sleepy. It wasn't strong though relative to the MJ.

Suggested method:

This herb would be ideal for avid spliff smokers, particularly cranky British ones.

Conclusion:

Not the wildest shit I've seen, but who's complaining?

Mary Jane

I decided to visit a new clinic last week. I'd heard good things about their prices and variety and because I had the new patient deal, I decided to splurge on a higher grade strain. Out of the 40 strains on hand, I ended up somehow only having a choice between two indica-dominant hybrids. Due to the variety in the medical scene, I've been fascinated lately with novel looking darker strains like lavender, blackberry, and now a generic sounding "Mary Jane." The MJ one-up'd the lavender by being almost black, a clear (indica)tor of its genus. The picture doesn't do this nug justice. Bits of the shake looked far from green.

While it wasn't shining with crystals like the blackberry, it was smooth and strong. I'd highly recommend MJ in small portions (gram-1/8) due to its immobilizing qualities that you might want to keep from habituation. Furthermore, I'd plan to have a tasty meal on hand as well as a good film or set of tunes.

Suggested method: fat joint/blunt at night.

Taking out the Trash and walking the Chemdog

I promise this is the last entry sans images and that I’ll begin to make more regular entries!

Lately I’ve had the same myriad of strains coming through, a lot of “kushes” and heavy indicas, etc. This has re-awoken my preference for sativas and similarly I have re-discovered my love for being a connoisseur and/or generally picky stoner. Options based on objective quality and genus is a must have for any cannabis connoisseur.

The two picks I have for everybody are “Trash” and “Chemdog.” Both are hybrids with a strong sativa side. The sativa took me by pleasant surprise after all the Indica dominance lately. Trash is a cross between Trainwreck and Hash Plant. Get it? Train + Hash = Trash… A friend hooked this up at a kind of steep price, but I’d say it’s well worth it. Another friend said about it “This is great, I haven’t felt this silly since high school!”

I’m not going to extensively review it though because I doubt it will come around again. If it does, your decision to get it shouldn’t be based on the specifics in this review because in all honesty it’s probably way danker than any sub-connoisseur shit you’d find. The nugs were large (as large as 4g for one nug,) stinky, crystally, and if you ripped a fat nug open the density of trichomes was maintained throughout the inside too.

Chemdog was a great deal and probably the best strain that I’ve found this year. In a club container, in a jar, in my backpack, just a gram or two of this stuff stinks all the way through. I’ve read about it and nobody really seems to know things for sure, but it could be NY Sour x OG, which seems to make sense high wise. I’m not sure about what the producers claim the genus is, but I feel from experience that it is a definite 50/50 split between indica and sativa. Both sides were strong and brought out the desired effects from said species; strong head and body high. This is my new favorite hybrid probably.

However, with the Chemdog one shouldn’t expect to go out into public. This bud is NOT subtle or weak. You’ll be noticeably high and maybe unable to socially function unless you are with other stoned people or people who are conducive for stony social interaction. I sat on a J for a while with others and was stuck in the end sitting, profoundly confused by theater students and their drinking habits.

That being said, it’s danky danky dank-dank-dank.

“You should’ve told me this was laced with euphoria!” said the same friend who felt high school silly with Trash.

Chemdog is probably way more likely available and if you have the means, I would suggest you spend whatever the clubs ask for it, even up to $25/g.

The blog will pick up with pictures and a more regular posting rate with new strains every time. I promise!

Sour Diesel and Super Skunk

I recall once being simultaenously stoned and overcome by the glory of banana nugs. This led me to coin the term "nuxury."

That's right... nugs and luxury = nuxury.

One of the nuxuries of college in California is the availability of cannabis. The downside of this is that it may desensitize one's weed smoking pallet. This makes it difficult to judge anything given the myriad of strains at one's disposal. With that, I've found it quite difficult to review any strains lately, despite my access to dank nugs.

The two strains that stood out to me thus far in my time back in California were Sour Diesel (an oldie, but a goodie) and "Super Skunk."

I've come across so many "Sour Diesel" sacks in my travels that it's hard to tell if the term is even valid among the unofficial weed community. There's obviously a lot of variety in quality and the bud in general. This sack I got was very reasonably priced for it's level of dank-ness. It was the first batch I found that had a notable smell. Sweet and fragrant. The buds were not particularly uniform, nor were they finely trimmed.

As for the Super Skunk, I found it to have a fairly unique scent. Definitely not the typical pungent skunk smell, but rather a subtle and earthy smell. This being medical cannabis, I was very impressed by the amount of resin glands and crystals.

I bought the skunk to celebrate my 21st birthday. The celebration started with a 10 dollar Chimay and was followed by a 1.5g grape blunt. Maybe the Belgian goodness affected my perception of the dankocity, but my smoking partners began shaking their heads as the blunt came their way. So, I took that as an indicator that it was dank and finished the last portion by myself. The sativa dominance left me pretty buzzed and awake while the combination of the indica qualities and the Chimay left me sedated.

Further birthday adventures with cheap wine and Sierra Nevadas may have clouded my perception even more. But as I sat with it for the next week, I came to a few conclusions. The high is almost an aquired taste. It leaves you sleepy for sure but before all the drowsiness hits you, you're enthusiastic and energetic in your stoniness. The taste is nice and smokability it high as is the smoker.

So, in conclusion:

Sour Dies' was worthwhile, particulatly given Los Angeles cannabis prices and the price I found it for.

Super Skunk was dank and had some sophisticated tastes, but it does leave you tired and does give me freaky munchies.

So I would suggest picking these up from your local medical supplier or in this case cranky Englishman and kush friendly Canadian.

Beaster Weed

I recently picked up a new 1/8 of one of the more interesting strains I've had in my travels. I say "interesting" in a neutral way though because the weed was very much unlike any cannabis I've encountered in my travels. When I gave this nug a whiff, it smelled earthy and almost like bark or... maybe even a pet store. Midway through my first joint of it, I came to the (admittedly stoned) realization that the smell I was trying to place during the pre-smoke exam was the zoo.

The zoo?

Yes. But a fellow connoisseur once passed nugs around and said "smells like doodoo right? that's good though." With that in mind, I ventured onward with more confidence.

These buds are small and the nugs are dense. It's notably soft and fluffy with red hairs, but it was prepubescent relative to some of the other nugs I've seen in my day. The stems cling on pretty strongly to the buds and the whole texture is pretty fibrous. The nug was seemingly devoid of crystals.

I did a bit of reading to see what the deal was with this earthy, crystaless weed and from what I read, this is referred to as a "beaster" which is a treated, de-kiefed style of weed from Canada. The kief is used to make hash, leaving a mediocre blocked out style of herb.

Smokability I would say is low. It hit very hard and unpleasantly and I was barely able to keep the joint lit. The smell of the zoo came through and became the taste of the zoo. It was kind of difficult to even finish the joint because the taste was so bitter.

With all that being said, it gets you STONED but not high whatsoever, largely due to the indica dominance. I often times was unable to even tell I was stoned. It made my body lazy and slowed me down mentally leaving me unsatisfied after my previous success with Afgooey. It's not a clear sativa high by any means.

While it puts your body to sleep, it does have a sense of low canabinol to THC ratio. Resulting in the more anxious side of being high. I wouldn't say this is a negative, just if you're prone to being anxious from smoking, this strain might not be for you. I haven't gotten post smoke symptoms though like cotton mouth or munchies, just couch lock.

I would caution future buyers to be wary of this smell. If these qualities seem to not fit your ideal high and you smell it and think it smells like hay and manure at the zoo, you might want to hold off or check out the alternatives. Also, I tried using a vape, and it was pointless because the buds have been stripped of all the resin glands, thus leaving it unvapable.

Fold...

While it definitely wasn't my first choice, it sufficed. So if you want pain relief, a sleeping aid, or you don't value taste in weed, then by all means pick up this weed from your local medical supplier, which in this case is more likely to be sketchy teenagers in another sketchy parking lot. However, if you have any taste in cannabis, stay away from the zoo smell because it's simply a sign of generic B.C. weed.

Northwest Afgooey

So I am going to kick off this blog of cannabis reviews with Afgooey.

While on a break from school (and thus the LA area) I have had an interesting set of experiences with picking up. Many of the 1/8's have been no-name weed, but this week I came across Afgooey. Despite my claims of connoisseurship, I had yet to try Afgooey.

I met up with an old pal from high school who I had gone to with my complaints of what seemed to be a totally dry week. Conveniently she had just acquired a large amount of this luscious herb and so I left with a baggy of one large nug, flattened into a sort of weed bar almost.

Upon my first examination I am overcome by the sweet smell. It has a definite tang of fruitiness similar to the "tropical" skunk I've found in the past. I've had this laying around for a week now and whenever I open the container I put it in, I still have that first reaction and think to myself "Oh yeah, that's what it smells like." The smell is a nice prelude or foreplay to each session.

The nug wasn't particularly dense and had what I'd say are medium sized buds. It was fairly sticky though. The buds would end up even sticking to my thumb when packing.

So the first round (bong bowls) I found it to be a fairly mild sort of smoke. It hit like candy, but this sweetness diminished after the greens more than I hoped. But now that I've had it for a week I've concluded that it's best vaped. The vaporizer really allows you to appreciate the flavor that would be lost in a bong hit. It's like inhaling warm minty, herby, candy flavor.

This strain perfectly complemented a cool northwest day, or for a cool day in any direction I would assume. The strong sativa high was very visual and heady. The colors of the trees and sky and sun all meshed together and I had a jolly stony grin the whole time. Definitely more "high" than "stone" though.

In summary, this strain is very nice particularly for it's scent, smokability, vapability (recommended), and vibrant high. I recommend getting it from your local club or set of teenagers in a sketchy parking lot at night.